Save Me from Myself
by Every-Beet-of-My-Heart
Summary: He didn't mean to hurt her.
1. Chapter 1

Lulu's search for Veigar was fruitless. No one in Bandle City could find the mage, and as hard as they tried to find him, he simply did not want to be found. The search had long since been called off and the people had dwindled to perhaps one or two wary pairs patrolling the perimeter of the city. Lulu, not one to give up, continued to look, first checking every centimeter of Bandle City and now roaming aimlessly outside its protections.

"Let's split up, Pix," Lulu suggested as the duo came upon the vast forest before them. Pix simply fluttered his wings in response, doing loop-de-loops as he flew off to the right. Lulu giggled, lacking her usual enthusiasm. She sighed, her smile fading, and went left.

Today, the forest seemed less marvelous. It had none of the mystical quality that Lulu typically saw; rather, it appeared as if it were mourning. The silence was oppressive instead of soothing, and a jittery sort of nervousness swept over the sorceress. The tops of the trees swayed with the wind, creating an eerie noise that made Lulu's spine involuntarily stiffen. The soft trill of a sparrow did little to placate her.

"Um, Veigar?" She called out weakly, laughing uncertainly. She walked around several trees aimlessly, scouring every square centimeter with her bright eyes. There was no Veigar, no blue hat, no evil speeches, and not even any visible movement.

"Oh, of course he won't hear me like this," Lulu scolded herself. Cupping her hands around her mouth, she tried again much more strongly. "Veigar! Are you there?"

As though answering her, a scream pierced the air, causing the eccentric yordle to nearly jump out of her skin. Despite its muffled sound due to the distance and its uncharacteristically high pitch, Lulu immediately recognized the voice. After all, she'd been looking for the owner for days.

Without another thought, an overwhelming sense of urgency and panic filled the purple haired sorceress, and she took off running. She had no idea where it came from; however, the fear was far stronger than her rationale. She ran until her lungs burned and her legs were weak, tears springing to her eyes as she pushed herself harder.

She finally stopped, bent over and coughing until she was able to bring oxygen back into her lungs. "I really, really wish I didn't have to do this," Lulu whispered breathlessly. She took as deep a breath as she could manage and called out to the silent forest, "Veigar! I'm here, but where are you? Say something, please!"

She waited perhaps 30 seconds before she heard him screaming again. "I was hoping that wouldn't happen." The Fae Sorceress wiped her eyes and steeled herself for a second round of running. "Only for you, Veigar. Only for you…"

She tripped over her feet several times as she scanned the areas she passed quickly. She imagined she had several cuts on her body from thorns and branches she hadn't pushed away in time. The occasional scream, some less pain-filled than others, numbed her to the pain and guided her towards the Tiny Master of Evil.

She nearly missed him, and she would have if it weren't for the flash of white hair she saw as the wind misaligned his hat. She skidded to a stop, sliding on the leaves and almost losing her balance, and for a moment all she could do was stare at him. He was huddled at the base of a tree, face turned towards the lichen-covered bark.

Cautiously, Lulu approached him. He still had not noticed her when she stood behind him, so she gently touched his shoulder with her fingers. Veigar jumped and turned too quickly for her to notice him doing so, and Lulu felt just as surprised as he, if only for a moment.

"Take...take me away," he gasped, as if he were drowning in the very air he breathed in. He latched onto her arm so tightly she feared the metal gauntlets might chop her arm off by accident. His hat was askew; his amber eyes were widened and brimming with undisguised fear. His face seemed uncharacteristically thin, and a moan that was sure to haunt her dreams for nights to come passed through his lips. His clothing was torn, shredded to mere threads among his arms, where she noticed his fur was matted with blood. At first glance she assumed he had been attacked, but the tips of his metal hands were coated in dried blood, and she immediately knew they were self-inflicted.

"What happened?" Lulu floundered about for something to do, some way to help.

"They're coming." The mage's voice was hoarse when he spoke, weak and defeated. "They want my blood...they want my life-" Veigar suddenly stopped. He let go of Lulu's arm and grabbed his head, throwing his ever-present hat off in a rage. He shut his eyes tightly and screamed, his hands curling into fists, the sharp fingertips scraping against his skin. Blood gushed out of his wounds, mixing among his strands of hair until it was dyed a frightening crimson red. It continued down his face, and Lulu panicked.

"Veigar,_ NO!_"

"I want it _gone_," he screamed, clawing at himself, "get it out of me! Get it _out!_"

She launched herself at the other yordle, screaming nearly as much as he. She wrestled with him, trying her hardest not to aggravate his injuries, until she finally succeeded. She had him pinned down with her admittedly tiny frame, his no longer thrashing arms held down at the wrists near his head, and Lulu sighed and deflated. She leaned against his convulsing form, sobbing into his bloodied chest.

Veigar himself seemed to be faring no better. She could feel him trembling beneath her, his eyes shut tightly like a child trying to block out the sounds of his parents' fighting.

"What's wrong?" Lulu whimpered, blinking back her tears with a sniffle.

Veigar moaned, turning his head as he tried to ignore her question. "Everything. It's all so wrong. It's happening again; make it stop, make it stop!" The purple-haired yordle tried to calm the agitated mage with soothing sounds as she laid her head in the crook of his neck.

"I'm not sure what's happening, but I was so scared. I- I still am. I thought that we- that I- had lost you." Lulu spoke slowly, her body tense.

"You already have, Lulu." The yordle in question lifted her head and looked at him curiously, not having heard what he said. Veigar shook his head at her, a silent plea to speak no more words. He relaxed in her grip, and she took advantage of the moment to carefully wipe away the blood on his exposed face with gentle hands.

The hysteria had passed as quickly as it had come, although the mage seemed to be suffering a bout of extreme anxiety and a sense of defeat. He suddenly went entirely limp, as if he were half-dead. Lulu blinked at him, hoping he was tired and not being affected by blood loss.

"Veigar?" she asked, shaking him. His eyes flickered open to stare at her, the golden irises bleak and lifeless.

"Save me," he whispered, his voice desperate.

"From what?" Lulu asked, matching his anxious tone. She reached for his face once more, almost afraid to touch him in such a state of fragility. He pushed her hand away, choosing instead to caress it with his own, the only act of comfort he was willing to give and needed to receive.

"From myself…" Lulu's heart ached at the sight of Veigar, now so broken and hopeless. Where was the confidence? The strength?

Where was Veigar?

* * *

**Author's note- **I've known that this story would be a chapter story ever since it came to me. That said, it will be nine chapters, no more, no less. I have everything I want to happen planned out (at least I have general guidelines) so it hopefully won't take long, but I'm busy and I can't guarantee anything. No matter what happens, I hope you like it!


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note- **_I'm so sorry that I'm updating after so long (yes I've had worse but it really wasn't supposed to be almost half a year). I really thought that having somewhat planned this story would've helped me update faster, but obviously not. I've still got class, sort of, so I have to take care of that in the next few weeks before I'm able to focus a bit more on what I actually want to do during summer. I'm working this entire year, I swear. Personal notes aside, I finished this up for you tonight and skipped all the things I was supposed to do, so I hope you enjoy! Drop a review if you have the time, yeah?_

* * *

If only Pix had been here. The fae was not only a companion to Lulu, but he also aided her magic. Looking at the wounds covering Veigar and the pool of his own blood he laid in, the sorceress couldn't help but regret her decision to have them split up.

The little yordle wiggled her fingers, her hands dancing lightly over Veigar's wounds. Ever so slowly, the pool of blood became shallower as it was absorbed back into the white-haired mage's body. Lulu, who was already exhausted, could not fix him entirely. A shiny red film of fresh blood still coated the ground, and it took all she had to stop him from bleeding further. She stood on shaky legs, breathing harshly. She fell as she bent down to pick up her friend, and wrapped one of Veigar's arms around her shoulders and stood once more, no more balanced than before.

She stumbled around drunkenly for a while before finally zig zagging forward in what was supposed to be a straight line, Veigar's feet dragging along in the dirt, which she tripped over more often than not.

"I just need somewhere where he can be safe," Lulu huffed, feeling the telltale sting of tears in her eyes. She rubbed the tears away in irritation. "Oh, honestly, I wasn't supposed to _cry_ over you, Veigar. I'm really not supposed to like you this much, and it really isn't fair for either of us, you know."

She sniffled, pushing branches out of her way as she slowly weaved her way deeper into the vaguely familiar woods.

"I don't know this place… I'm not sure how I got here or how to get out, so I hope that when you wake up you'll be able to lead us back," she grumbled, brushing away a branch with very pretty purple flowers on them. She plucked one and tucked it in her hair, giggling to herself. The sorceress stopped short as she saw what she just walked into. The scene may as well have glittered for as much as she loved it.

"What's this…? It's like another world here. Oh, Veigar, it reminds me of the Glade! It's just like home!" Lulu's gemstone eyes sparkled as she took in the deep, otherworldly blue of the waterfall in front of her. She shielded her eyes from the sun shining in the open area, walking in so lightly she felt as if she were flying. Veigar was no longer with her, instead sitting against a tree with his chin to his chest and his hat placed securely on his head. Her dearest friend was too heavy and, as of right now, far too fragile for the sorceress.

Lulu danced around in the sunshine with a blinding smile, longing to jump in the water just because she could. Unfortunately, a quick glance at a blood-soaked Veigar reminded her of her priorities and she moved to bring him back to the open area she was in.

She laid the unconscious mage in front of her, his eyes closed and a frown marring his face. Dipping her fingers in the cool water, Lulu gently wiped the drying blood away, her hands tracing the troubled lines on Veigar's face.

"You should smile more." She decided, using her index fingers to give him a slight smile. "You look better when you're smiling. Less unhappy. Less gruesome." She sighed, placing her hands back at her sides.

"You look more like sunshine and less like storm clouds when you smile, did you know that?"

Silence reigned for several moments as the fae sorceress become lost in her thoughts. Snapping out of her reverie when she had finished cleaning Veigar to the best of her abilities, she noticed how wretched he truly looked. The ugly, open gashes all over his body pained her as she saw bone and muscle within them, showing how deep his wounds ran.

Knowing she would regret her decision later, Lulu watched as Veigar stitched himself back together at an agonizingly slow pace. Muscles repaired themselves and his skin smoothed, leaving only the lightest hints of scars.

Lulu's throat tightened as she started coughing uncontrollably, her eyes watering and lungs refusing to function. Wheezing now, she fell on her hands and knees, crawling for a fleeting moment before her elbows buckled and she collapsed on the floor. She gave in to the black bliss creeping on the edge of her vision, the rushing water her lullaby.

* * *

Waking up feeling horribly sore was something Lulu expected. Waking up trapped in one of Veigar's Event Horizons was not.

"I… Veigar, what-?" Her throat was dry and rough, a side effect of her decision to use her mana until she fainted from exhaustion, combined with her constricting worry for Veigar.

Veigar's high-pitched laugh (or was it more of a cackle?) pierced the silence and Lulu involuntarily flinched away, shutting her eyes tightly. Once she opened her eyes again, her green irises sought the dark mage, only to see him smirking at her from a rock several meters away.

"I don't know what your plans for me were, wench, but I can assure you that now that I am in good health, you won't be able to follow through with them." His voice seemed distant, his eyes observing her without a trace of familiarity. Lulu reared back, hurt.

"Wench? How could you say that to me? I thought that we… Aren't we friends?" She asked tenderly, her voice laced with a vulnerability she rarely showed.

Veigar scoffed. "Friends?" His face twisted with the unfamiliar term. "I don't have friends; I have enemies and followers, but never friends. Whoever you may be, I warn you that I cannot be harmed. I will not be swayed by your appearance, so tell me—who sent you?" He stepped off of the rock and took several steps closer to her, narrowed amber eyes staring intensely into widened emerald eyes.

"N-no one sent me. No one would." She shook her head vehemently. "No, I brought you here because I care for you. I would never do anything to hurt you or that would compromise our friendship. You know that. You _know that_."

Veigar looked at her with rage clearly on his face. With a shout, he closed the distance between the two and his arm lashed out.

Lulu didn't realize she was bleeding until she heard the droplets hit the ground.

"You fool!" He screamed, looking angrier than she'd ever known him to be. "You question me? You claim I'm spouting_ lies_? I am invincible! I have faced trials you cannot imagine, obtained power you can only dream of!" He took a deep breath, composing himself. He looked back at her threateningly. "Just you wait, lowlife. I will prove my power to you. You will regret your words, for this is only a taste of the pain to come." His eyes lingered on her a moment longer, the eyes of a stranger and the eyes of someone who so desperately wished for him to remember she wasn't. Veigar turned and walked away, back into the woods and leaving her frightened and alone.

"You can always be harmed, Veigar," Lulu murmured quietly as she gazed with blurry eyes at his retreating back. "You may be strong, but you're no god." The first tears began to fall, sliding down past her quivering lips to join the blood that still dripped onto the blades of grass.

The salt water of her tears fell into her fresh marks, irritating them further. She rubbed her eyes with a sniffle. "This isn't the time to cry. He'll come back, he always does. Smile, Lulu, wouldn't want to worry him, now would we?"

She only cried harder.


	3. Chapter 3

Lulu had laid down, her head resting in the crook of her elbow and her legs curled up in front of her. Days passed, blurs that she hardly recognized as she was constantly alone and slowly going mad. She found she talked to herself to fill the silence, and spent her days dreaming, while her nights were quiet and cold and she was left awake.

Veigar didn't see her for a long while, but he did occasionally, although he only recognized her once.

"_Lulu?" The sorceress in question perked up, elated. He hadn't said her name in what felt like ages, hadn't looked at her with anything but cold detachment and anger. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and tossed a stray leaf from her purple hair, smiling in relief._

"_Veigar! Oh, it's been horrible, I'm so glad you're back! I've missed you terribly. What happened, do you know? Could you, um…undo this?" She gestured to her confinement._

"_You idiot," he answered back fondly, moving forward to undo her restraints. "How do you get yourself into such messes?" He halted as the magic brushed across his fur, a seductive call for something he had forgotten was his. He shuddered, his muscles contracting longingly at the familiar feeling. It was so wrong and he stepped back, now fearful and suspicious._

"_Lulu," he asked slowly, "who put these up?"_

"_You did, Veigar! Well, sort of. You see, it was you, but not the you that you are now, and I really don't understand how it works, but you've been really mean lately and you haven't really known who I am. Do you know? And more importantly, are you okay?" Lulu babbled, her enthusiasm peaking. "Veigar? Why won't you undo it? Where are you going? Please don't leave me again."_

_His eyes were steel and he refused to look at her. "This isn't happening… It's not right. I told you to get it out! I told you to GET IT OUT OF ME!"_

_And he took off running, afraid and alone, back into the trees._

* * *

Lulu hated the feeling of Veigar's magic, hated the way it stubbornly plastered itself to her skin and made her feel dirty. She hated how it made her feel cold, how it was alien and uncomfortable to her.

She loved it still because it was Veigar's. She clung to it because it was all she had.

It grew more familiar to her as days and nights passed. Every so often, as if to beat it back, she'd nudge it away with the little magic she could muster. Where it used to hiss angrily and recede, it now curled affectionately about her, forming calming pulses as it slid along her fragile shield. She hated how it did so, but she was so _tired_, so she nudged it again and let it wrap around her.

"It is…pleasant with you?"

Lulu blinked slowly and lifted her head to see the yordle.

"Where's Veigar?"

"I am here. Have you turned blind?" She nearly thought he was amused. It made her furious.

"_No._ No, where is Veigar? Where is my friend? Where is the mage who would appear without a word when I was having trouble and save me in a fight? Where is the yordle who would threaten to hurt me but couldn't dare to place a hand on me? So let me ask again: _where is Veigar?"_

She watched as the amusement fled his eyes and his face hardened to steel.

"He's gone." He replied tonelessly. "I am who I have always been. You seek someone who disappeared long ago."

"He isn't gone!" Lulu cried back with conviction. "People don't just disappear. Other people just stop looking, but I won't, and I never will! He'll come back, I know it! He always does. He promised, and he's never let me down."

For the first time, she saw a flash of surprise in the gold eyes of the man who called himself Veigar. "Perhaps he decided to start now." Because he was nowhere to be found, but she just couldn't let go.

But this Veigar didn't leave. He settled near the water and watched her, to which she glared back at him unwaveringly.

"I will wait."

So she sat.

And she waited.

Night fell, and although she had stayed up to wait for Veigar, who was so precious to her, she found herself falling asleep. She closed her eyes, briefly wondering why she didn't remember the cuts and bruises on her body, freshly bleeding. Maybe they would scar.

And she wondered, humorlessly: _Maybe Veigar and I can match._

* * *

**Author's Note: **It's, well, it's been a while. I'm sorry if you were reading this, but I forced myself to write this chapter. I lost the outline that I had for this story ages ago and then completely forgot about it, so I don't remember what was supposed to happen at all. It's been hectic on top of that, so my own hopes for this story aren't that high. Anyway, I'm sorry it's short, but I hope it's not horrible. Things have been really good for me this past year so it was a little weird writing a sad sort of story when I'm in the mood for anything but. That being said, sorry again, and send me a review, yeah?


	4. Chapter 4

She was alone. Alone. So alone.

_Help!_

_Pix? _

Pix is gone. She was no fun anymore.

Home. She wants to go home. She has no home. Not anymore. Here is home.

She still wants to go home. No, never. She can't.

_Save me. Save me. Save me._

* * *

"Please let me out. I want to go home," Lulu whispered, tired with a sore throat from useless crying. Her eyes were puffy and her frown seemed permanent. Hope was a silly thing. She was too tired to be silly. She was too tired for hope.

The magic surged, angry and crying. It hugged her, almost suffocating her, and she melted into its hold. No resistance. Resistance was futile. She couldn't leave. It didn't want her to leave. Veigar didn't want her to leave.

"I have to leave." She sobbed into Veigar's dirty yet somewhat comforting magic. "I have to go. I'm dying."

She felt the hesitation. It poked and prodded her, checking her heartbeat and looking for reopened wounds.

"That's not it. That's not what I mean. I'm not—I won't—this is killing me from the inside out. I can feel it. I can feel myself dying. Please, let me go. I've lost everything. I haven't—haven't got anything left," she pleaded in despair.

And Lulu cried. It made her head hurt something terrible, but she did it anyway, even though she hadn't had anything to drink in ages and she was dehydrated and she had just finished crying not two minutes ago. She cried. She wept. She sobbed. She whimpered. She bawled her dull green eyes out until she tasted blood on her tongue and she kept wailing. She just kept on blubbering into filthy, sentient magic.

"I don't want to be alone," she whispered, bottom lip trembling. Her eyes were closed to block out the throbbing in her head and the inevitable dizziness that came after every bout of heavy crying.

"You aren't alone," came the muttered response, and Lulu knew she had to open her eyes then or she wouldn't believe her ears.

"V-Veigar?" She sniffled, squinting at him suspiciously and, dare she say it, hopefully.

"Of course you aren't alone, my little sorceress," he purred. "You're mine."

She noticed the possessive glint in his eye and scooted back from him. He laughed, high and cold, and walked towards her, passing through his enchantments as if they were mist. She eyed him with trepidation, though he merely rolled his eyes at her.

"There is no need to be so fearful," he said dismissively. "You are perfectly safe."

While she did not entirely believe him, she relaxed noticeably. He walked around her, placing his metal-clad hands on her shoulders to prevent her from turning around to face him. This made her incredibly tense yet again, at least until she realized he was simply plucking leaves from her purple hair.

"Um, V-Veigar? What… er, what are you doing?" She winced as he tugged particularly hard on her hair.

"You are mine. Present yourself as such," he commanded, drawing her attention to the dead leaves and crumpled leaf pieces he was pulling from her hair. Lulu remained silent only due to her surprise. He was almost…tender.

She sat there quietly as Veigar patiently combed through her hair, even brushing it—albeit painfully—with his metal fingers. She was too afraid to lash out and stop him, but she wasn't even sure if she wanted to. It had been so long since she had felt anything remotely nice. Since she had felt anything at all, really.

Unable to control herself any longer, Lulu swiftly turned around to look at the Tiny Master of Evil, ignoring the acute pain in the back of her head as sharp edges dragged along her scalp. Months had passed; she was used to pain.

"Veigar, I know that you are not so much the Veigar that I know or the one whom I've been waiting for, but I want to thank you. And I also know that you have—have motivations for doing this, or whatever, and that's okay, I guess. I haven't had anyone since…this…started, or felt kindness. So thank you. Truly, thank you." And she looked at him so earnestly, and so pleased, that he couldn't help but to feel a little something, too.

There was a strange glint in his eye that Lulu couldn't identify, and only hoped it was something good. He reached out to caress her cheek, drawing his thumb across her newest scar.

"You are mine," he responded curtly, "and I always take care of what is mine." He increased the pressure of his hand just enough for it to hurt before abruptly withdrawing and turning to leave.

She heard him continue speaking as he walked back into the woods, and felt a chill creep down her spine.

"Oh, my _darling_ sorceress, care is such a strong word. This is only the beginning of being _mine_."

As Lulu brought her fingers up to trace her new mark of ownership, her smile faded as she realized how much she felt like an object and how little she felt like a yordle.

And yet, she couldn't help the hope that still blossomed in her chest as she watched him leave. Oh, she knew he didn't care for her or even like her, but her heart was fickle and not at all in agreement. She couldn't help the dreaded feeling that started fluttering within her, and although it hurt her terribly, and she knew it would only get worse as time passed, she was helpless to stop it. Lulu wasn't sure whether to smile or cry.

She was falling in love with her Veigar. With her cruel captor. With the sorcerer who tortured her. She laughed miserably. Love.

But the heart wants what the heart wants.

Apparently hers wanted to die.

* * *

**Author's Note- **_Oh my gosh. Guys. I am so sorry. I really wanted to update this sooner but I forgot until recently that this even existed. I wrote this in like two days and it took a different direction than what I originally planned so hopefully you don't mind. I'm also going into uncharted territory for me, so I was going to do a little literary research but I felt soooo bad that I just wanted to get it done. Maybe another time I'll come back and add more, but this'll have to do for now. For those of you who have put up with the long update times, thank you so so much. And to all of you, thanks for reading and (hopefully) reviewing! Maybe I can crank out another chapter before summer's over._


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